Action Figure Grows Mustache With Titties

See anything funny over the weekend with your drinking buddies?  Get ready to shit your panties to some Action Figure Therapy.  This guy has 189 videos on his youtube channel, so your welcome.  Here’s 4 to get your started.  I’ll be watching these all damn day.


The Rebel Flag is Officially Too Offensive for America

THE CLICKER – The 1969 Dodge Charger from “The Dukes of Hazzard,” known to the world as the General Lee, prominently features the Confederate flag on its roof in the popular 1970s-1980s TV show. Some reports now say the flag will be removed from certain toy versions of the car, and at least one former “Dukes” cast member tells TODAY he’s furious.

Tom Wopat and John Schneider flew around the hills of Hazzard County in the General Lee on “The Dukes of Hazzard.” Now the car’s Confederate flag has become an issue.

Exactly what products might be altered isn’t clear. As reported by ScreenCrush, a poster to’s message board wrote there that he was told by a sales rep for the Tomy toy company that “starting January 1, 2013 all Dukes of Hazzard General Lee vehicles will not be allowed to be produced with the Confederate flag on the top of the vehicle. This directive has been passed onto us from the licensor Warner Brothers.”

When contacted for comment by TODAY, a Warner Bros. Consumer Products spokesperson would say only, “Creative changes have not been made to the look of the collectible, die-cast version of the General Lee vehicle featured in the “Dukes of Hazzard” TV series.”

No clarification was offered on whether products other than die-cast versions of the car would be altered.

Although the report still hasn’t been confirmed,  HobbyTalk readers had no trouble believing it. Wrote one, “Not surprising. They have been removing the image from the model boxes for years. I have one that was a giveaway from the Kansas City Royals that has the Royals logo on the trunk and no roof flag.”

Another wrote, “Was at a Hobby Lobby today. In the model kit section was a 1/25th scale General Lee … without the Confederate flag on the roof!!! It looked strange, to say the least! It’s like the Batmobile without the bat logo.”

But another reader took a different stance. “I am from the West and yes to me the Confederate flag does not (represent) anything positive,” he wrote. “We don’t see Germans flying around the swastika flags (because) it’s their history.”

And yet another wrote that rather than produce a General Lee without the flag, he believed that toymakers would just stop making reproductions of the car. “Warner Bros. will no longer endorse the license for anything that has the Confederate flag on it,” he wrote. “Therefore, if you are a die-cast manufacturer, your license will not be approved if your sample has a Confederate flag on it, (such as the General Lee, Hazzard County Patrol cars, Cooter’s tow truck and so on) if the sample is produced without a flag then it will be issued, but no one is going to do a General Lee with just the 01s and General Lee lettering, it would look silly.”

That same writer noted that with an earlier version of the General Lee, “Warner Bros. requested the flag not be seen when it was on a store shelf. A removable, body-colored cling was attached to the roof of the car to cover the flag until purchase. I knew when this happened that things would be changing soon.”

Although the report still hasn’t been fully confirmed, the mere idea that the General Lee could be altered has angered “Dukes of Hazzard” star Ben Jones. Jones played the General Lee’s mechanic, Cooter Davenport, on “Dukes of Hazzard” and later served two terms in Congress as a Democrat from Georgia. He now owns Cooter’s Place, a chain of “Dukes of Hazzard” museums located in Gatlinburg and Nashville, Tenn.

After hearing the report, Jones released a letter of disapproval to the press on Wednesday, criticizing what he feels is a “narrow-minded, elitist” move on the part of the television studio.

“More than 33 years since the show premiered on CBS-TV on Friday nights, Warner Bros. has issued a new and terribly insulting attack on the South, a region and a culture which Hollywood has trashed for decades,” Jones wrote. “Some unnamed genius at the company feels that the flag is ‘offensive to some’ and therefore it has no business on a classic TV comedy about a bunch of good ol’ boys and girls in the Southern mountains. This is a new level of “P.C.” idiocy. I don’t know about you, but I am tired of being insulted by morons.”

Jones tells TODAY that the decision could hurt the “Dukes of Hazzard” brand by misrepresenting the nature of the flag to young people who watch the show.

“It will make kids unhappy and confused,” he says. “To me, they’re destroying innocence. They’re not responding to people who watch the show, they’re responding to those who don’t follow it. It’s insulting to my culture and my work.”

He adds, “The flag is a part of the almost perfect design of that car, which has been voted the most popular car in the history of film and television. That’s not going to go away. It’s an idiotic decision.”

Jones stresses that he was an avid supporter of the Civil Rights Movement, participating in countless demonstrations in the South in the 1960s. He says he believes in a deep respect for all people, but believes that to assume the Confederate flag merely represents slavery is to overlook history.

“I have a good feel for where people’s heads are on this thing and I don’t understand why it’s happening,” Jones told TODAY. “When “The Dukes of Hazzard” was a big show, it was this positive thing about the car and the culture and the kids, and that went on for years. It is a permanent part of Americana.”

I think only one thing needs to be said here:

Just the good ol’ boys, never meanin’ no harm, beats all you ever saw been in trouble with the law since the day they were born.

Straigtnin’ the curves, flattenin’ the hills, someday the mountain might get em but the law never will.

To listen to the full song by Waylon Jennings listen to the video below.  And if that don’t get you fired up, then I’ll see you in hell.

Check out this video on YouTube:

Extreme Tailgating: The Ultimate Dunkaroo

Nothing like starting your pre-game boozathon with a cold dunkaroo.  This guy takes it to whole new level.

1.  Assisted Full Vertical Head Dunk

2.  Shot of Whiskey

3.  Shotgun Beer

4.  Back Flip Off Platform

5.  Beer Bong

Mason Jar Tribute: Latarian Milton


Mason Jar Sports solutes you, Latarian Milton, for bringing pure joyous laughter into our lives since 2008.  Latarian, you are the real Scarface.  We need people like you.  So we can point our fucking fingers and say, that’s the bad guy.  Is grandma still pissed off at you?  That’s ok…another quaalude, she’ll love you again.  Ever since you officially made it ok for us to do hoodrat stuff with our friends, our lives have been total disasters.  But holy shit, it’s been fun.  Me and all my buddies smoke cigarettes and do hoodrat stuff all day every day and love it.  Cheers.

Original Video – embedded disabled by request – bitches


The Kid Strikes Again


Daniel Tosh Interview – embedded disabled by request – bastards

Looks like Matthew McConaughey got his drinkin’ buddy back.

LA Times-  Lance Armstrong effectively surrendered his seven Tour de France titles Thursday, announcing he was giving up his years-long fight against accusations that he cheated to repeatedly win cycling’s greatest race.

U.S. Anti-Doping Agency Chief Executive Travis Tygart said late Thursday he was still waiting to hear directly from Armstrong but added that the cyclist’s decision not to proceed in an arbitration process will leave Armstrong stripped of all of his Tour titles and 2000 Olympic bronze medal and result in a lifetime competition ban.

“There comes a point in every man’s life when he has to say, ‘Enough is enough,'” Armstrong, 40, wrote in a statement emailed to The Times and other news agencies.

“For me, that time is now. I have been dealing with claims that I cheated and had an unfair advantage in winning my seven Tours since 1999.”

Armstrong’s attorneys asked a USADA attorney to turn the matter over to UCI, the international cycling union, but USADA maintains it retains jurisdiction to strip the titles.

We have the phone call between Lance and McConaughey after news of his stripped Tour titles. 

“I mean I always got the Creatine/Muscle Builder booster at Jamba Juice… Would that show up?”

I can completely see Lance turning into Uncle Rico… just crushing beers, selling magazines door to door and talking about the good ol’ days… But until then why not take the guys word for it, he never tested positive for steroids… who knows what those guys at Jamba Juice were throwing in his morning smoothie, I blame them. They sabotaged him. His previous teammates have all given significant evidence that he was doping but I think he was the only one on the team with natural ability. It’s the Tour De Lance.