TORONTO SUN – LONDON, Ont. – An Ontario man is facing charges after he and his buddies constructed a motorized picnic table and drove it around town.
Police said they attached a lawnmower motor and four customized wheels to the picnic table and took it for a spin on Sunday evening.
But the joy ride came to a sudden end when residents called police to complain about the group scooting around London’s streets, allegedly with open booze.
When officers found the table parked on a sidewalk, they charged a 46-year-old South Huron, Ont., man with having an open container of liquor in a public place.
BY SCOTT TAYLOR , LONDON FREE PRESS
DIBS. Dude, look at this fucking thing! BADASS! How clutch would this be tailgating? Fuck going into the game, I’d be on top of this bitch banging some college slut behind a motor home soaked in keg beer to devil went down to georgia. Since when did rednecks move to Canada? Who wants to road trip it to Ontario real quick to debo this modified pussy magnet before dumbass gets bailed out. Jenna Marbles, go ahead and prep you’re best titty tricks cuz I’m picking you up next Wednesday to film your next youtube video. Seriously dude, you were riding around London’s streets on a motorized vehicle chuging liquor? What did you think would happen? On a Sunday evening? Nobody will notice me riding around on this giant keg with mud tires? You got a fucking 6 foot flag waving above you bro! And that lawnmower engine doesn’t exactly sound like a toyota prius coming into town. God, I would’ve loved to have been there.